Wednesday 17 March 2010

times














the unborn

I Was feeling sorry for myself

I Lost interest in anything else
I Could only see.
My baby died inside of me
I Had to forgive myself

I Had to move on to something else
My friend Had an idea to cheer me up,
Lets see a phychic

She had a message from an unborn lad
He said Mummy please dont be so sad
I chose not to live, cos I had a bad heart
I didnt want to be a burden

I Felt overwhelmed and yet relieved
I Knew it was time to stop the grief
I Smiled through my tears
At last I could bury my fears

She had a message from an unborn lad
He said Mummy please dont be so sad
I chose not to live, cos I had a bad heart
I didnt want to be a burden

I Felt overwhelmed and yet relieved
I Knew it was time to stop the grief
I Smiled through my tears
At last I could bury my fears
He didnt want to be a burden,
no he Didnt want to be a burden
no no noooooh
He didnt want to be a burden

my baby.

Monday 15 March 2010

!

Cunt!
That is all

Sunday 7 March 2010

too much on my mind

the closer i am to leaving this drag of a town the more i have on my mind. i need some sort of release, i need someone to talk to, i need a shoulder to cry on, i just need someone to take the time to listen.
its all got too much and i feel like i may break down

Bear



Every time i read this my heart breaks even more.

its strange how you can lose so much in one month.

November 2009 - pure heart ache and pain

my bear and my baby

Head fuck!

I loved you like a sister and you abused my friendship, you stripped me down until i had nothing left but my real friends. if it wasn't for my girls god knows what sort of state i would be in now.

yet just a few words and my heart wants to let you back in. i think of all the good times we had, and the pain you caused disappears.

yet in my head i keep thinking, am i being silly? will you hurt me again? how can i trust you after everything you did to me?

help?

Wednesday 3 March 2010

i wish i was as pretty as her!




And that tattoo is HOT! x

what tattoo should i get tomorrow???

Swallow on my collar bone/ shoulder?







A cupcake on my thumb?




Or Happily Ever After tattooed across my right hip??

Geeky Night with the Sister :)






Tuff & Deadly @ The Royal Basement . . . . Great Night :)

Hair cut and colour!


Been a While!

so as your all probably aware im moving to Blackpool in 4 weeks! so excited! im also very scared. im mainly worried that i wont make friends or that if i do make friends they will be nothing compared to the amazing friends i am leaving here in Southend! im still unsure what i should take with me?! a lot of clothes and shoes and photo's thats for sure!

Leaving Drinks @ The Railway Pub, 7pm, 26th March!

Thursday 4 February 2010




I wish i could click my fingers an it would be as if you never left me!
but instead you are safely placed in my heart!
I wasn't ready for you, but i would have given you every thing i have!
RIP

Monday 1 February 2010

Lost and confused

I know how i feel and i want to do whats right for me so i can be happy but i don't want other people to be unhappy because of the decisions i make!


Do i follow my heart and risk someone being hurt?


Do i follow my head an stick with this unhappiness and uncertainty just so i please others?


Or do i say Fuck it all an leave myself and others unhappy?




How can i please everybody?


Totally lost right now



L.A BOXERS and an awsome after party :)

Only pictures can describe the night. . . . .


Great night
The End.